I just love digital cameras. Today I downloaded some new photos and also deleted some bad ones. Here are a few favourites.

Christmas wouldn't be complete without several rousing games of Monopoly.

Yvonne and I with our finest holiday accessories. The wine had nothing, absolutely nothing to do with it.

Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen things I'm looking forward to.

1. Christmas eve with my children.
2. Christmas day with the extended family.
3. The 2 days and nights we'll be spending at Pinewood Lodge.
4. Our open house on December 30.
5. Singing Christmas carols.
6. Learning to cross country ski. Wes and I start our lessons in January.
7. The birth of my niece and her husband's baby.
8. A huge dumping of snow. It's not in the forcast but I can hope, can't I?
9. Skating at the Forks. All I have to do is find my skates. Has anyone seen my skates?
10. A visit from John and Tena after the baby is born. I know they're not coming to see me but I'm hoping they'll be able to tear themselves away from their little grandson for a while.
11. Wes' week off, between Christmas and New Year's.
12. Playing my newly tuned piano.
13. The book "The Dissident Daughter" that I ordered 2 weeks ago and still hasn't come.

Better, Much Better, Thank you

Ahhh. Finally feeling like my old self again.

We (Prairie Bounty) and Eric catered a successful job yesterday for a local Mennonite NGO. My sisters had done quite a lot of catering in the last few weeks as I whiled away my days on the couch. It was good to be back in action.

It was a pretty peaceful job and we found ourselves standing around in the kitchen for much of the time, occasionally moving around in the room where the event was happening, replenishing trays. While we were standing around, we talked about how much fun it would be to have an open house. We do love to cook together, especially for friends and family. We decided it would be on December 30, sometime in the afternoon or evening.

So... anyone who reads this blog is invited to attend. We'll be sending out emails and invitations but some people will inevitably be missed. If you are reading this post, you are welcome to join us. Email me if you need the address.

There was someone yesterday from the Celiac society and she asked us if we might be interested in catering for them. They have trouble finding people who can cook for them with their diet restrictions. That's the kind of job we like so hopefully she'll follow up. We are pretty good cooks but we are not very good at the administrative part of the job and alas, we forgot our business cards. Again. Fortunately, Yvonne found some in the bag with the serviettes so we were able to hand out a few. Michele said we need one more sister who is good at administrative stuff. Maybe we'll have to adopt.

One of the good things about catering is that we always have too much food. Yesterday we all took home some cut up fruit and veggies. Supper tonight will be a stir fry with fruit salad for dessert. Thanks MCC!

Bored

I suppose that means I'm getting better.

It's hard to post anything new and exciting when you haven't been out and all your news of what's happening on the outside is coming from the people you live with or the CBC news which only seems to be reporting on Brian Mulroney and Karl Heinz Whateverhisnameis.

I got 2 new antibiotic perscriptions from the doctor yesterday. That's got to kill any kind of bacteria left in my body, don't you think?

I must be getting better. I'm complaining more.

On the bright side, my new favourite author is Sue Monk Kidd. I read "The Secret Life of Bees" for the third time this week. I also finished a book of short meditations of hers that I bought some time ago. Sue Monk Kidd has grappled with lots of spiritual issues in her life and currently I'm reading "When the Heart Waits" which is the story of her mid-life crisis journey. It is powerful stuff that I can really relate to although I would suggest to her to change the name of her book. It sound like one of those cheap romance novels.

Sue Monk Kidd's "When the Heart Waits" is to a romance novel what dinner at a five star restaurant is to no-name mac and cheese.

Really.

Still Sick

Half way through the antibiotics

T3s are gone

Brain turning to mush

Couch getting saggier by the day

Still glad the malfunctioning uterus (Michele's words) is gone

He usually sits in the red chair beside the fireplace.

I don’t sit too often when I’m home. Most of the time I’m in the kitchen, cooking for my family and sometimes Prairie Bounty, or on the computer writing and replying to emails, or on the phone. Lately Kristen’s been in the kitchen studying for exams. Tim might be there too, drinking a cup of coffee and talking about his day. Medardo and Mauricio will come through and tell me a story. Or a friend may be visiting and we’ll share a cup of tea.

Sometimes I’ll walk past the living room and see him, waiting. I’ll promise him that as soon as I take care of this load of laundry, I’ll come by to spend some time. It’s so easy for me to get distracted though and several hours later, I’ll walk past him again. I might throw a quick prayer his way-“please God, be with my friend who’s going through a hard time, help Kristen while she’s writing her exam, bless my family…”

He just sits there, waiting for me. Not like someone demanding my attention but more like someone who wants to get to know me. Someone who would like nothing better than for me to stop for a moment and rest at his feet.

Finally, I find some time. I lie on the couch as he sits in the chair, his full attention on me. I dare not look into his eyes for they are so full of love and compassion for me, I may lose myself in them. I tell him about all the things that are on my mind. My children, my spouse, my brothers and sisters, parents, my in-laws, nieces, nephews and friends. I pray for George Bush, Stephen Harper and all those other people who have great power. I ask him why he doesn’t do more about AIDS, poverty and injustice.

Finally, I am spent. I have no more words, no requests, no more demands. I know he has listened and has heard me but he says nothing in reply. No answers. All of my words lay in a jumbled heap at his feet.

We sit in silence for a while and the next time I look at him, the floor around him is clear. For the first time in what seems like forever, I look into his eyes, full of unconditional love, compassion and grace. And finally, when I’ve said all I can say, when I am finished, he speaks.

“I love you Linda. You are more precious to me than anything in this world, even more than you love your own children. There is nothing you can do to make me love you more or less. The only thing I want from you is for you to sit with me and allow me to show you how beloved you are. And even if you can’t find the time to do that, I will not love you less.”

And then I walk over to him and sit on his knee, allowing his love to completely wash over me. I lose myself in his eyes knowing I am completely safe with him and that there is nothing I need except to be in his presence.

Reformatting

Eric is my favourite son today. He must have spent 6 hours reformatting my computer and now it is so fast, I can hardly keep up with it.

Sick

Tylenol 3s are great little pills to have.

Sushi

It seems that the toughest thing so far for pregnant Nicole Richie, has been to give up sushi.

I have several friends and relatives who are also pregnant. I wonder how they are managing without their sushi?

Poor girls. I had no idea.

I will try my very best to be more considerate towards you all. I thought I had it tough when I was pregnant but at least, I never had to give up sushi.

I didn't even know it existed.

Working Hard

While I was basking in the sounds of my son's voice and guitar last night, my sisters and Chelsea were working their you-know-whats off serving at a banquet. They had been at my place all day where we prepared and cooked much of the meal. But I knew to go to the hall and serve would not be good in terms of my recovery.

I'm feeling a bit guilty because they have lunches to serve today and tomorrow for a conference and Michele has quite a lot of added responsibility for this event. I'll let her tell you about it if she wants. I won't be there today either.

It's happened a few times that only 2 of the 3 sisters have worked an event and it's always been fine. Often, Chelsea, my niece, fills in for the third sister. But when the 3 of us do something together we shine. It's like singing in harmony. Not only do we work well together, we have fun too.

So while I didn't miss lugging those blasted dishes up the stairs and loading them into the car last night, I did miss the cameraderie and feeling of a job well done with my sisters.

I think we'll have plan a little lunch date to debrief in the next week or two.

Thanks you two (and Chelsea).

I Should Have Taken A Picture

Last night we went to the Starbucks location where Tim has been working for about 6 months. He will never get rich, or be able to support himself and a family working at this place, but he is happy. He won't be a barista forever but, this place is good for his soul.

(I love the word barista. It is one of the few words in our language that is gender neutral but sounds feminine; unlike so many words that can refer to both men and women that have a decidedly masculine sound to them.)

The Christmas party was held last night at Tim's Starbuck's. The store is open from 6:00 AM to 11:00 PM 7 days a week so it is not possible for the staff to have a Christmas party unless they close the store which will never happen. Instead, they served samples of some of their drinks and foods to the customers while Tim and 2 other baristas he works with brought their guitars and sang carols.

I never tire of seeing and hearing my children play and sing so when Tim invited us, I knew we had to go. Because he still lives at home, I hear him playing alot. I love Christmas carols and not only were they performed well last night, there were a few people singing along, in harmony. It sounded beautiful.

This was one of those moments where I didn't expect much but ended up receiving lots. I thought we'd support Tim, buy a coffee, listen to him and leave. And I suppose that's what we did. But I didn't expect to be so blessed and touched by a bunch of amateur musicians, jamming with their instruments and voices, having fun. The sounds of harmony and guitar, of people in quiet conversation, interspersed with laughter-the pleasant peaceful sounds of Christmas.

A lovely moment in time.

Determination

That Kristen. She is one determined young woman.

She's been having some trouble with her car battery and was trying to find a way to take care of it. The car has been parked on the road beside our house for about a week and she's been using mine since I haven't been needing it. She was in no rush to deal with it and besides, it's been cold around here. Who wants to work on a car when it's -20 outside? It was easy to just leave it alone and hope (?) that somehow the problem would go away.

Yesterday, the winter parking ban was put into place. This means that there is to be no parking on the streets of Winnipeg between the hours of 2 and 6 AM. It makes snow clearing, much of which happens during the night, a lot easier. If your car is left out on the street, you can get either a parking ticket or your car can be towed, neither one a good option.

Suddenly the dead car on the street became a priority.

It was Saturday night and there were no men around to do it for her. And I wasn't going to do it! I'm still convalescing for pete's sake! Besides, I know that it's really important not to mix the red and blue cable up. You can do some serious damage to a car. I never remember which one is positive and which is negative. I usually have Wes, my KISA (Knight in Shining Armour) do it for me.

So Kristen, in her usual fashion found a way. CJ did a search on google (whatever did people do before the internet?), found the proper way to boost a car, and made notes. They went outside together, Kristen placed the booster cables in the proper spots on both cars and...it started! I think they were as surprised as I was, and very pleased with their achievement.

The car is now in Wes' spot in the garage, and a new battery is sitting on the kitchen counter. The guy at Canadian Tire said she could replace the battery herself, it's that easy and I think with her new found confidence in her mechanical abilities, she just may try. Or, Wes might really want to park his car in the garage before it snows again and end up replacing the battery.

We'll have to see who can hold out the longest.

Another Saturday night and I ain't got nobody...

I'm feeling just a little lonely tonight.

Wes is away for the weekend and I didn't go along because I'm still recuperating from my surgery. Those of you who know him, know that he's not a very talkative or noisy sort of a person but I still notice that he's not here.

Kristen's been at work all day and is going out in a little while, Tim's been at work since 2:00 so it's just been Dixie and me. I did some baking this morning but that tired me out so much that I just hung around all afternoon. I'm feeling a little more energetic now but I've got nobody to hang with. Dixie would love a good romp in the snow but that's not going to happen.

I've always thought that I'd be okay if Wes were to die. I don't usually mind being on my own and I can find things to keep me busy. Now that the kids are adults and off doing their own things, the only people around this old house many evenings are Wes and I. And when he's gone, I miss him. I think that's how it goes. The longer you are together, the more dependent you are upon each other. I never thought that would happen to me.

He drives me nuts sometimes, and I drive him crazy too but somehow, we manage to live together and love each other through it all.

Usually it's me who's gone for a night or two. I wonder if he feels the same way when I'm gone?

Well, it's gone.

On Monday, November 26, my uterus was removed with surgical precision. It had successfully carried 4 babies to term and for that I'm grateful. Lately however, it had been giving me such grief that it was becoming increasingly hard for me to function normally. So when my doctor said, "Let's just take it out" I jumped at the chance.

I'm supposed to take it easy for a couple of weeks, which isn't much of a hardship. Who wouldn't love a few weeks on the couch, reading, writing, meditating and watching DVDs? Every now and then I get up to go to the washroom, check out blogs and emails or just walk around, trying to get my strength back. I've got Medardo and Mauricio vacuuming, Tim cooked supper last night and Kristen took the dog for a walk this morning. They're all pretty willing to take up the slack. Not a bad way to convalesce, I'd say.

I'm feeling uncreative and uninspired so there might not be anything too interesting on this blog for a while.

Just thought I'd let my faithful readers know what's going on.

It's a Dog's Life

Today's post is from Dixie.

Oh, what a busy, busy morning. Linda, is doing some housecleaning today and I need to follow her everywhere she goes.

I enjoy housecleaning days because if I'm lucky she'll leave a garbage bag lying around in the kitchen and I get to check out it's contents.

I love playing the broom game too. Linda gets the broom out, moves it across the floor and I chase it. I love this game but it seems to frustrate Linda. When she has her little pile of stuff that she has swept up, I always like to check it out because there might be something yummy in there, just like the garbage.

When she gets down on the floor to do something, I sniff at her hair and try to plant loving doggy kisses on her cheeks. She doesn't seem to enjoy this so much but I keep trying. One of these days she'll come around.

The vacuum is a little scary. It makes a really loud sound that I don't like but it's kind of like the broom. I like to chase it, although when it moves too fast, I need to get out of the way. Right now, Linda's cleaning it out and muttering something about dog hair. I don't know what she means by that. Fortunately, she doesn't seem to enjoy the vacuum so much either so it doesn't come out too often.

Well, she's on the computer now so I best be getting into my favourite place to sleep and relax. Good thing she doesn't clean house too often. I'd be exhausted all the time!

Comments

I have been a blogger for over 2 years now. I have met some great people on line and have also had the pleasure of getting to know some family members and friends in a different way. By and large it has been a fun thing to do.

One of the things I enjoyed especially at the beginning of my blogging experience was the comments. People actually wanted to say something about my posts. Sometimes, comments develop a life of their own and some great debate and dialogue occurs. Almost always, the comments have been positive and affirming.

I received one rather negative comment once and actually deleted the whole post because I didn't want to be reminded of that person's unkind words. More recently, some people who are near and dear to me have been on the receiving end of some very unkind and inconsiderate words. Sometimes, these commenters remain anonymous. Other times, they make their identity known.

I know that when we bloggers post, we open ourselves up to the scrutiny of others. We share our opinions, knowing that other people might not always agree. I suppose that is a risk we take. There are many things that I will not post about because I'm afraid that people may misunderstand where I'm coming from and will say something that can send me into a downward spiral of insecurity and self-doubt. Many posts are not written and real sharing of the heart does not occur.

I suppose the internet is not the best place for sharing the deepest secrets of one's heart. These words are out there for millions of people to see and we must expect that someone can take our words and misread them, flip them around and jumble them up so that their true meaning is lost.

Most of the bloggers I know have been hurt by comments at one time or another. But we still post. I am glad that you are willing to continue writing because I find great pleasure in hearing stories about your children, work, trips, ponderings of your hearts, things that frustrate you and everything else that finds its way onto your blog.

What I have appreciated so much is the way commenters will defend bloggers when an unkind and thoughtless comment has been made. I think that is something about this blogging community that I have really come to respect.

Comments are less important to me now than they were at the beginning. I guess I've evolved a bit that way. I just enjoy blogging as a way to remind myself of my day to day life. If people want to leave a comment or not is fine with me.

However, I really believe in the old saying, "If you can't say something nice, then don't say anything at all."

Better yet, this verse from the bible (Ephesians 4:29) says it all:

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths,

but only what is helpful for building others up

according to their needs,

that it may benefit those who listen.

Grey Cup, Here We Come!

The Bombers won. Kicked the stuffing out of the Argos. I'm glad that our beloved Bombers won but I always feel sorry for the team who lost.

Next week, Saskatchewan and Winnipeg meet at the CFL final, the Grey Cup. You can be sure that we'll be glued to our TVs watching this match up.

Unfortunately, Winnipeg will be at a huge disadvantage because our amazing quarterback (Kevin Glenn) broke his arm in the last few minutes of the game and we just don't know if he'll be able to play next week. That means the 2nd string QB (Ryan Dinwiddie) will be leading the charge and he hasn't seen much action this season.

We'll just have to count on the rest of the team to work that much harder.

I can't believe I'm posting about this. I think that I have become a true blue Bomber fan.

I just had to get rid of that picture on my last post and my only option, besides deleting it, is to write another post.

My brain isn't working too well these days. Lack of sleep is the major culprit but when you live with 4 teenagers/young adults, there is often a fair bit of activity happening after one retires for the evening. I had the pleasure of a nap on the couch this afternoon. I love naps.

A friend came over earlier this week and we talked about my kitchen. I have a huge kitchen, with lots of cupboard space but it isn't set up in a very organized manner. When we first moved in (13 years ago) I didn't give much thought as to where things should go. Over the years I've made a few changes but things are still disorganized. It will be good to utilize my friend's suggestions. I just wonder why I waited all these years to do this, especially when we are planning to put the house up for sale in the spring?


It won't be easy to leave this place. It is a beautiful, old house with gorgeous woodwork, lots of windows and lots of space. It's in a great location and there are huge trees all around. We're trying to prepare ourselves for the reality that our next house will be very different. I'm not usually too attached to things but this old house has seen some of our best living. It will be strange driving by it one day and pointing it out to my grandkids as the house we used to live in.

The real estate market is sizzling in Manitoba. I used to be more worried about selling our house than about buying another one. Those worries have been turned around. I think we'll be able to sell more easily than it will be for us to find something that's right for us.

But now is a good time to move and while my heart is not ready, my head knows we need to do it. Besides, we got bitten by the travel bug when we were in Italy and we want to do more of that. A smaller house will make that easier.

There's a new coat of paint on most of the inside and outside, the carpets have been replaced and other repairs have been made. This house is the spiffiest it's ever been. In a few weeks, the kitchen will be organized, as it should have been years ago.

So, if you live in Winnipeg and are looking for a gorgeous house, with lots of room and a to-die-for-kitchen, give me a call and we'll talk.

I just may have to ask you for visitation rights.

November 10, 1983

A memorable day. I was pregnant "out to here" and anxious to have this baby who was already 5 days overdue. It was an uneventful day and at 11:00 PM I went to bed, hoping that perhaps, tonight would be the night.

It was.

Around midnight, my water broke and Wes and I headed for the hospital. We had a lovely young woman living with us at the time and I gently knocked on her door to tell her we'd be leaving. It was great not having to worry about Ben who was only 2 at the time.

I hadn't been at the hospital long when labour was becoming too much for me to handle. I asked for an epidural and was given one almost immediately. The pain and discomfort left and Wes and I both actually dozed off for a few hours. It was the most peaceful, pain free labour I could have had. After a while, I noticed that something was feeling different. The nurse checked my progress and told me that I was ready to deliver.

Eric was born, with the help of forceps at around 6:00 in the morning. I couldn't see much but I did hear my doctor say, "Wow! Look at the size of that shoulder!" And then someone else said that perhaps there was a future for Eric in football.

And then he cried. Anyone who has delivered a healthy baby knows that sound. It is the most unbelievable, amazing sound in the world. I will never forget the first cry of each of my children.

There was some concern for Eric's health because of his size so he was whisked to the intermediate care nursery along with all the other wee little babies. I was sent to a recovery room to wait for the numbness in my legs to subside, worrying about my baby, reminding myself that he was in the best place possible. Besides, Wes was with him.

A few hours later, he was brought to me. He wasn't the cutest newborn, especially with forcep bruising, but he was absolutely precious. He was almost 11 pounds and considering he had to move through a pretty small passage, he did quite well.

Today, Eric is 24 years old and still precious to me. When I look at him, I still see that helpless, beautiful baby. At the same time I see a talented, intelligent, compassionate man. It's been fun watching him grow and I'm looking forward to the next 24 years.

Happy birthday Eric!

What's a Guardian to Do?

We've had some problems with threats in local schools lately. I think it all started sometime in September (I was out of the country at the time) when someone wrote something nasty on a washroom mirror at one of the universities in town. The university took this threat very seriously

Since then, there have been at least 8 or more copycat threats made in similar ways. I think it's usually lipstick or something like that on the walls or mirrors of the washrooms. While the first one was at a university, I think the subsequent ones have all been in high schools. Schools remain open but if parents do not feel comfortable sending their kids to school, they may stay home.

Yesterday, a threat was found at the school M&M (our 2 international students) attend. Students were told of the threat and also of the fact that they could stay home if their parents or guardians were concerned for their safety. It is now 8:42 AM and there have been no sightings of M or M. Last night they expressed to me their fears about going to school and weren't sure if they felt comfortable attending (wink, wink, nudge, nudge, snicker, snicker). This is all just a big joke. I told Mauricio that he better not tell his parents because they are somewhat overprotective of him. If they heard about this, I think they'd tell him to get on to the next plane to Brazil. Medardo's family worries little about him and his safety and his father, who happens to be a police officer in Mexico, would probably make him go.

So, for now, they are both safe in their beds and will likely remain there until 2:00 PM or until their stomachs cannot handle another moment of emptiness.

I feel like going up to their rooms and kicking them out of their beds. They are not fearful for their safety. They see this as another excuse to miss a day of school. Mauricio could miss some school, his grades are amazing and he seldom stays home. Medardo is another story. We recently received a letter from the school concerning his frequent absences and the fact that he better not miss any more school because he is in jepardy of failing this term. He doesn't seem to be concerned.

I think that:

• the schools should not give students and parents the option of staying away from school.
• the media needs to stop reporting on these incidents
• the kids who are caught doing this need to be seriously disciplined.
• M & M will be doing some housework or something for me today. This is not going to be a fun day at home.

I'm getting too old for this.