Happy Birthday Kristen!

My “baby” turns 17 today. Yup. Halloween day. She was born around 5:00 PM, right around the time that my poor, stressed out mom was dressing up 3 little boys in their respective costumes and attempting to respond to the calls of “Halloween apples!” by the front door. She managed, I managed and she was even able to come to the hospital and visit me after the evenings festivities were over.

This post is dedicated to Kristen Elise Postma, my one and only, my beloved daughter.

When I was pregnant with my fourth child people would often ask me if I was hoping for a girl. I always said no, that I would be happy with either sex. And that was true. But when you were born I realized that having a little girl was really a bonus for me. I truly would have been happy with a boy but it has been a real treat having another “girl” in the house.

Kristen, I have always admired your discipline and perseverance. You seldom procrastinate. You are one of the few people I know (your dad’s another one) who will start on a project when it is assigned and not wait until the day before it is due. I think that is one of the reasons that you have always been on the honour roll at school.

Perhaps because you were the youngest or perhaps because you were the only girl, you always felt that it was important for you to let your brothers know that you could not be “pushed around.” You expressed yourself clearly and strongly and they responded to that.

You have always had an independent nature. You could not be easily convinced to do something that you didn’t want to do. While that caused (and at times still causes) some difficulties between you and I, I know that this is a wonderful trait for you to have. You will decide to do something because you want to do it and not because someone else says you should. Do you remember the time when Tim cut his finger and needed stitches? One of the ways you asserted your independence was by not wanting to wear socks. Well, when you heard that you had to join your dad to take Tim to the hospital, I was shocked as to how quickly you could find a pair of socks and put them on. You were ready to go in record time.

You always loved to do crafts. The messier, the better. Finger paints, papier-mâché. Remember the time Tim had a project due on a Monday and (unlike you) didn’t start it until the day before? The project was a relief map including rivers, a mountain and various other geographical features. This is something that we knew he could never finish on his own so you got in there and with great enthusiasm, helped him with his project. He got an excellent grade on it too, thanks in a large part to you.

Another thing I admire about you is your determination. When you decide you want to do something, you will do it until you are satisfied with the outcome. Remember that you wanted to learn how to play the song from the Titanic, “My Heart Will Go On and On?” I tried to convince you that there was no way you could learn it but you kept asking me and asking me until I finally began to teach it to you. I was sure that you’d get bored before too long and give up. Well, I taught it to you one measure at a time and sure enough, you learned how to play the whole song. I was, and still am amazed that you learned it and that you played it so well!

It has been such a pleasure to watch you grow up. You have made many wise choices over the years and some not so wise choices. But you have learned from your mistakes and that takes real wisdom and maturity. You have taught me much about myself and while that has been hard for me, it has been good too. You have reminded me that I can trust you, that you can make good and wise decisions. You have graciously forgiven me when I have not treated you as I should have. You have been patient with me when I have had trouble letting go.

These 17 years have been quite a ride for us, wouldn’t you say? I’m looking forward to this year, your eighteenth. It will be a big year. You’ll probably get your licence, experience you first kiss (oh no, you’ve probably already had that) the grad retreat and then graduation-gown, hair, nails, makeup… You’ll need to decide what you’re going to do next year too. You’ll be experiencing lots of big changes.

Just remember, your dad and I will always be here for you. We might not always agree with what you do or the decisions you make, but we’ll always stand by you and stand up for you. We will have some hard times. But my love for you will stand the test of time-of that I’m certain. We’ve weathered storms in the past and we will survive whatever comes our way. You are my daughter and I love you.

Happy Birthday!