I am playing the piano at a funeral tonight. I do not know the man who died but I do know his brother. While this is a sad occasion for the man's family and friends, I am not emotionally involved.
So, today, for much of the day, I am practising. This man was an Elvis fan so I will be playing a lot of Elvis's "religious" stuff. I am having a blast, playing old hymns.
While I was playing today, a thought occurred to me. What if I practised several hours every day and then offered my services to funeral homes around the city to provide live music? That would be a sweet job, I think. Playing piano happens to be one thing that I love and never tire of doing. And I love funerals. They are terribly sad occasions, there's no doubt about that. I know that even tonight, I'll have to keep my emotions in check because I know that I will be moved. I always am.
At a funeral there is no denial. People for once in their lives are real. There's no denying death. There's no denying the sorrow, the pain, and the emptiness caused by someone dying. We cry together. At a funeral we acknowlege that death sucks and we can finally admit that there's nothing we can do about it anymore. We surrender. Finally.
A funeral is a time where we slow down for a moment and take stock of our own lives. We wonder what people will say about us, when our time comes. Will we have made an impact? Will people miss us? How many people will show up? Have we changed the world, or at least, our corner of the world? And what about life after death? What will that look like?
I have been to lots of funerals and at every single one, whether the person was "religious" or not there is a sense that the deceased is "in a better place." Those of us who are still living find comfort in that fact. I always feel bad for the friends and family of the people who have specified they don't want a funeral. There is no opportunity to get together, to laugh and cry and remember the person who died. I think we all need that kind of closure.
Today, I'm going to do my best to help Joe and his family remember the best things about his brother. And I hope in some small way, the music that I play will bring a measure of peace and even serenity during a hard time.
8 comments:
I went to a funeral today too for a close friend. I haven't been able to stop crying yet. I hate funerals.
I don't care about a traditional funeral, and I rather hope that they don't have one for me. But I insist that the family gets together to send me off. They need to mark the moment somehow. Yes, I hope they sing or listen to some of my music.
I have a piano again for the first time in over a decade.
I spent the morning playing it and having similar thoughts.
Even brought out all my classics and thought I might try putting myself out there for weddings, too.
you were awesome, i thought as i watched you play.
i thought that, and i thought, 'linda is such a good sport.'
I do believe in the purpose of a funeral and do realize that they are more for the benefit of those still living. I like what I am seeing lately, a small departure from the traditional funeral, a somewhat happier occasion where the departed's life is remembered and celebrated. There is still sadness and tears but often there is also laughter and good memories. Live piano music, especially of personal favourites would be a great addition and one that I would like at my own. Yup.. I do think about it. :-)
That's neat Linda. I'm sure Joe and his family felt blessed by your calm presence and amazing talent. I love that idea as part of 'remembering' the person. Like you Coll, I too have noticed the traditional funeral changing and it's seems so much more honourable to the person who is gone.
that sounds like an amazing job idea. I've thought about funeral work as well, but I'd likely talk too loud and keep giggling.
Not good.
happy birthday, beautiful! Looks like you've got lots of people who love you.
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